Last time I wrote about how caregivers, including Chaplains, can neglect themselves in caregiving relationships. This happens when Chaplains, clergy and others who are providing care to another don’t recognize or reject their own power and authority, and also when caregivers don’t recognize their own needs and therefore neglect themselves. Continue reading
***update 9/15/17: I received a link to an excellent, comprehensive article by Rachelle Slotman on identifying and coping with burnout. The link is here and I have also posted the full article here. Thanks to John Hawthorne for the link!***
I wrote previously about what I call the Therapeutic Triad, describing how any counseling or caregiving relationship includes three elements: myself, the other and God.
What I’ve experienced in my years of counseling and chaplaincy is that often the relationships between these three can be problematic and can malfunction. Where ideally the relationships between the three elements should flow freely in both directions, it seems that problems arise when these relationships only flow in one direction or when one of the three elements is neglected. This neglect can impact the counselor’s effectiveness and also create stress, tension and helplessness in both the counselor and the counselee. Continue reading
Counseling and care have typically been seen as a dyad consisting of the counselor and the counselee. However this limits the scope of the relationship as it often fails to recognize the presence of a third other, which is God. Counseling done within the context of chaplaincy, as well as any other form of Christian or spiritual counseling, whether professional or not, is better thought of as occurring within a triad, recognizing the presence not only of myself and the other, but also of God. Continue reading
I just wanted to give a shoutout to one of my favorite podcasts, Seminary Dropout. The host, Shane Blackshear, interviews some real movers and shakers in the Christian literary and cultural worlds, as well as people you probably never heard of. I’ve been listening for years, and Shane is one of the best interviewers I’ve heard.
He recently interviewed author Peter Rollins and I thought it was so good I wanted to highlight and link to it. You can go to the show’s episode page here, subscribe in iTunes or your podgrabber of choice, or click the link below to listen right away. You can even enter contests for books here and there. And he’s not famous, so he will actually interact with you if you hit him up on Twitter!
“You’d better be careful, Sam. You’re going to burn out like this.”
These were words from my CPE supervisor several years ago. At the time I was a bit taken aback. After all my schedule certainly seemed manageable, and I felt I was doing OK at work and at home. Sure I had my struggles, but found a way to pick up and keep going every time. This March I realized he was right. Continue reading
A week or so ago I sat down to plan some things out. I find that I don’t tend to be a planner unless I feel the need to have something concretely in front of me to refer back to. This was less of a planning than a brainstorming session, really. Brainstorming to develop the plan. The plan was how to fix myself. The brainstorming was to figure out how.
Caregivers rarely take the time to consider their own needs. They are constantly putting others’ needs before their own, in some cases to their own detriment. Sometimes it’s saintly, and sometimes it’s sick. After talking with a few people I found that I was teetering toward the sick end of the spectrum myself. Continue reading
I may have said this before, but I think pastoral care is a dying art.
The evidence for this is overwhelming, at least from my vantage point. Seminaries demand multiple years of attention to developing skill and knowledge in exegesis, languages, hermeneutics, and preaching, but I doubt if most require more than a semester devoted to pastoral care issues such as counseling and crisis management. I’m thankful that at Yale Divinity School I was able to focus my attention on this area, and that it offered several different courses on pastoral care and counseling to different groups. I had a great deal of freedom to do this in that I was not tied to denominational requirements. I didn’t take any languages because I never saw myself as an exegete to that degree. However most of the other students there were following programs to meet their respective denominations’ requirements. In some cases this required a semester of pastoral care or CPE, but I don’t know if that was across the board.
When did ministry become an academic exercise, focused primarily on sermon writing and exegesis? When did ministry become a business for that matter? When did pastoral care become something that only happens in a couple marriage counseling sessions or when talking with a family about what songs or scriptures they want at their dad’s funeral? When did pastoral care get assigned to lay volunteer prayer and care groups, who may get little if any training or support beyond a space and time to meet at the church? When did clergy become too busy managing the church to provide care to the people in that church? Continue reading
I’ve been reading Radical by David Platt with some guys in my church small group. I’m about half way through it, and while there are good points to be made I have some major issues with others. Not to go too far into it, but I think he has a gift for overstatement.
Anyway, one point he makes is that all Christians are called to global evangelism. He equates calling with command in this case:
We take Jesus’ command in Matthew 28 to make disciples of all nations, and we say , “That means other people.” But we look at Jesus’ command in Matthew in Matthew 11:28, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest,” and we say, “Now that means me.” (p73)
It is true that we often pick-and-choose what we find most appealing in Jesus’ teaching and apply what we like the most to us while putting aside what we don’t. However this argument made me think about the notion of “calling” in general. Continue reading
So is being angry at God a sin?
I’ve come across this a couple times from some Christians, especially those from the Reformed/Calvinist end of the spectrum. I heard this most recently on the radio from a very well respected theologian who was doing a Q&A at a conference. For some reason most of the questions he got seemed to irritate him, and this one really hit a button with him apparently. Someone asked about how he could handle and reconcile his anger at God following the death of his son, who was in his 20’s if I remember right. The speaker said that there was absolutely no reason to be angry at God, rather that he needed to “repent” of his anger lest it lead him into some even worse sin. His reasoning was that God gives us so much, and when one thing gets taken away we get all upset and feel He is unfair.
Romans 1:18 For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, 19 because that which is known about God is evident within them; for God made it evident to them. 20 For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse.
I’ve been doing a lot of reading and thinking about the idea of salvation, namely who is saved, who isn’t, and why. Having been raised Calvinist I’m now questioning some points of it more directly than I have in the past, the state of the “unreached heathen” or “reprobate” being one of them. Traditionally Calvinism and many other branches of orthodox Christianity would say that those that never hear are lost based on the passage here in Romans. The teaching is that all of humanity knows something of God which can be inferred from the world around them. However this truth has been suppressed by the idolatry of others, leading all mankind to be in a state of sin. The implication is that all of humanity has been given knowledge of God but that humanity has rejected God from the beginning. Therefore, the species is under righteous judgment. Continue reading